Friday, October 16, 2009

Project Runway: Sequins Suck

Winner: Carol Hannah
Auf'd: Shirin
Challenge: Design a stage outfit for Christina Aguilera

A few things that need to be said first ...

1. Did anyone care AT ALL that Christina Aguilera was the guest judge? Besides Nicolas, that is. I believe he said something like, "This is the best 'Runway' moment ever." Maybe if you're a drag queen, but for the rest of us, Aguilera excites us about as much as Bob Mackie. Greeeaaaat.

2. If Nicolas doesn't get kicked off soon, I'm going to write a strongly worded note to Nina, Heidi and Michael. I've seen white feathers about as much as I ever cared to this season and they keep kissing his ass for it. (I've also seen his pasty white pumpkin face quite enough as well.)

3. Minnesota Chris, listen up. Get your crap together. This is the third week you've been in the bottom 3. For a stylish gay man, a challenge involving sequins should be no sweat. I'm disappointed yet again, especially with your sad little boy panties. You call that a reveal? I call it what Nina called it: Taste-less.

OK, now onto Shirin. Noooooooooooooooo!!! She was my little muse. So cute and giggly, and now she's gone. My jaw actually dropped when Heidi said her name. Shirin almost won last week with her wedding dress that she transformed into a cute little wearable cocktail garment. She's won a challenge, and I don't remember her ever being in the bottom before now. Chris, on the other hand -- as much as I want him to stay -- has been in the bottom three weeks in a row. I'm definitely feeling like last night the decision was made for shock value.

However, I can't say her dress wasn't awful. It really was. But so was everyone else's. I'd say Althea's silvery number was the least disappointing. Except for that black feathery jacket. That was crazy. Carol Hannah's black, floor-length dress was the winner. ... I don't know. Feathers? Pasted on satin? Not really my cuppa. But neither are sequins and sparkles.

But, we must look forward. Now we're down to seven designers, and here's how I would love it to go down: Chris gets his act together and earns his way into the final four. Joining him would be Irina (even though she's horribly mean), Althea and Carol Hannah. One of them would be eliminated right before Fashion Week by having the weakest collection, and I would want that to be Carol Hannah. She deserves a shot at it, but I just don't think she'd quite measure up to the clear vision each of the other three have. Obviously, that means the annoying Nicolas, the extremely lackluster Logan and the vision-less Gordana would be auf'd during the next three challenges. I'm definitely keeping my fingers crossed.

Until next week ... auf wiedersehen.

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